Urban Meyer Vows Revenge on Baker Mayfield, Oklahoma

Photo: NewsOK

Allen Kellogg

Columbus, Ohio

After a shocking 31-16 loss to Oklahoma in Columbus, Ohio State head coach Urban Meyer is already plotting to take his revenge.  Meyer said he guarantees Ohio State will make the playoff and hopes the Buckeyes draw Oklahoma in a grudge match.

“That loss was disturbing and humbling,” Meyer said, “Buckeye nation expects noting but total victory and to see that little bastard plant their flag on our field, I will not let that stand.”

In a shocking return to visible stress levels on par with his time at Florida, Meyer said he would perform a blood oath and summon whatever demons it takes for Ohio State to run the table in the Big 10. This  most likely would give Ohio State a spot in the College football playoff for a third time.  Meyer said he called his former Heisman winning QB Tim Tebow and asked him to speak with his team about the loss and about the steps to take to get a chance for vengeance.

Tebow made a famous speech at the end of Florida’s loss to Ole Miss which rallied the Gators into winning a national championship against Oklahoma 24-14.  Tebow allegedly used witchcraft to give Florida a super natural advantage over their opponents.  The dark magic worked as Florida won all their games the rest of the season.  While the effects of the curse had little impact on Tebow’s soul, several of his teammates have suffered the consequences of his actions.

Meyer said he wasn’t worried about divine punishment or risking the souls of his players.  Winning is the only thing that matters Meyer said.  He said he is willing to risk everything for the opportunity to stomp Oklahoma and Baker Mayfield.

“I guarantee one thing, Meyer said,  “If Oklahoma crosses the 50 when we play again,  you can call me Goering for the rest of my life.”


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